RUMBLING WITH EGO IN PARTNERSHIP

Happy Monday! How has your week been? 💟💞

Do you find yourself having more rumbles with your partner's ego than tumbles in the bedroom? 🤣💨💫 Does it feel like that story you read to your child at bedtime, 'We're Going on a Bear Hunt' where you 'can't go over the mud, you can't go under it, you've gotta go through it?' 🐻🐻 Yep, working with an ego can definitely feel like thick, oozy mud! 💩💩🐾 When you're in it you may not see your own path - the fog can cloud the bridge up ahead. 👁‍🗨👁‍🗨

I have certainly had my fair share of pesky rumbles with my partner's ego 🤣😁 (and yes I used to have a very strong ego so I'm no exception 💪), however, breaking through can feel like the sun finally coming out after torrential rain! 🌟⭐☀🌞There's absolute bliss, peace, intimacy and affection when you're not fighting with an ego. 😍🥰😘

Some of the most common patterns I've experienced in my own home with 'ego' as well as helped clients with are:

*Doesn't need any help and believes it's right.

*The outside world (eg finanancial situation, career, health, children's behaviour) 🤑👭 influences how the person feels.

*Operates from fear - fear of being out of control, addressing pain, getting help.💥💥

*Everything is measured, rigid, inflexible. 💨

*There may be a lot of physical pain in their body - unprocessed emotions that are stored in organs glands, body parts etc 🤐😩

*Justifies and defends a lot in communication. 😣😤

I am so grateful to my husband who is happy for me to share an example of how his ego used to surface in our home. That man certainly does rock! 😍🥰

Through awareness we realised his self esteem/ego thrived on challenge/struggle/stress. 💥💨💥 If you're ever in a life or death situation, you definitely want this man by your side! 💟🌈 However, when I was thriving, loving life, high vibration he would pull away or take from the space. He no longer felt valuable or needed. 🌱🌈 A new belief was created where he believed he was worthy to give and receive from a deep, loving, intimate, light and easy partnership. 💖💏💑

The Emotionally Happy Homes® tool I used a lot to navigate through the mud 😊 was 'Trust energy' where I trusted myself to kindly and warmly share what I was seeing. So I would say, 'My love, can you see that you're controlling, in fear, justifying or defending etc right now? What would you love to create or feel in this space?' 😍😘🥰

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Please know that you are so welcome to email me back if you have any questions, feedback or if there is anything I can help you with. 💚 Here's to creating Emotionally Happy Homes® from the inside out. 💕

Sending you all so much love,

Kirsten

P.S. If you would love personal awareness to untangle any deep subconscious patterns and create your own Emotionally Happy Home®, please call our office angel, Jane or Suzy at Step Up Your Life, Coolum Beach on: 07 5351 1970. Can be done in person, over the phone or via Skype. 🙏💟🎉😍

PARTNERSHIP - GIVING OR GETTING?

Happy Sunday! How has your week been? 💟💞

One of the most important things I've learnt in partnership is to go beyond 'how or what do I get?' to 'how can I be a contribution to who my husband is and what is in his heart?' 💞🌈💗If you wholeheartedly believe you can give yourself everything you need, then partnership can be a space you joyfully give to, without needing or expecting anything in return. ☮

I was quite frustrated with our outdoor garden and patio some time ago and I found myself repeatedly asking my husband about it. 🌱🏡🌼 I was curious why he wasn't leaning into finishing the no dig garden and tiling of the outdoor area. When I spoke to him about it, he honestly shared that it wasn't an excitement for him right now. I realised I'd had an expectation on him. 🌺🌼

It was an excitement for me so I was really happy to choose/buy tiles for the alfresco, organise a tiler and finish the no dig garden. 🎉✨ I have to admit that maneuvering a Bunning's trolley with 10 heavy bags of compost and big bales of sugar cane mulch down a hill to the car, was an interesting experience. 💪💪💥 Definitely would've been one for 'Funniest Home Video's'. 💖💞🤣

The female energy in us all (we all have male and female energy) loves the freedom to follow our independent excitements, to flow and to receive growth when the waters may feel turbulent. 🌱💦🌏 The gift you can give to everyone in your home is to encourage them to follow their soul's callings and to ask them where they would love you to contribute to their heart. 😍🥰

I don't need anything in our family, but there are lots of desires in my heart. 💜💚💜 My heart loves to feel light and happy in my day to day, so I love it when the males in my family can contribute to that. I love how our son spoke up the other morning. 🤩😍 He asked how yoga was and my reply was, "Wow it was so tough - a real challenge". 🙏🧘‍♀️ He said, "Mum, do you realise you say that every morning?"

I was like, "Oh my goodness, I do don't I? 🤔😋 However, my choice is to feel inspired by my practice, to notice where I've improved, become more present and celebrate moving my body every day". I loved his contribution to my growth! 🙏🙌🤜

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Please know that you are so welcome to email me back if you have any questions, feedback or if there is anything I can help you with. 💚 Here's to creating Emotionally Happy Homes® from the inside out. 💕

Sending you all so much love,

Kirsten

P.S. If you would love personal awareness to untangle any deep subconscious patterns and create your own Emotionally Happy Home®, please call our office angel, Jane or Suzy at Step Up Your Life, Coolum Beach on: 07 5351 1970. Can be done in person, over the phone or via Skype. 🙏💟🎉😍

PERSONAL POWER

Joy is in taking responsibility for YOU! Wow – this has been a big lesson for me! Taking responsibility means that there isn’t blame in your home. It isn’t someone else’s fault. When I was 21, there were so many spaces where I didn’t take responsibility for myself – I didn’t say ‘NO’, I didn’t teach people how to treat me, I didn’t value me and I then lived life very much from a victim mentality. I blamed my husband for choices that he did/didn’t make but it was me who gave away my personal power. Now our reality is very different. We both take responsibility for our choices. If we say we are going to do something and we don’t end up doing it, we own it. It is incredibly freeing to take back your personal power and openly communicate from a space of compassion if you haven’t followed through somewhere. There is so much more love in partnership when individuals are taking responsibility for their choices. Sending you so much love and joy xx

CREATING IN PARTNERSHIP

My first post for 2016 and here it is!!! My word for 2016 is JOY!! It is plastered in capital letters in my dream book for the year!! I am excited to experience more of this feeling than ever before!! So I was eager to see the film, ‘Joy’ at the cinema, hoping to discover enlightened ideas on my 2016 exploration of this theme. While I was inspired by the female character’s resilience to follow through with her dream, I felt quite perplexed with two of the messages that appear to be in many a modern day film. Firstly, the idea that creating is a real struggle and results in a great deal of financial burden when following one’s dreams. Secondly, the idea that there is very little joy to be experienced in family and overwhelming regret about what could’ve been. We all at some point experience these different feelings (I definitely have with with past health issues), however, I wholeheartedly believe that each and every one of us can create joy today in our everyday lives. Not just when we are on holidays, or on long service leave, or when there is a special celebration, or on the weekends. In this very moment, we can consciously create the feeling of joy! One way that my husband and I feel joy and connection is in dedicating a few hours a week to actively sharing what we want to individually create. We love discussing how we can individually support each other to follow our highest joys and creations, but more importantly, I feel the joy is in giving to each other’s independent visions, whether that be through encouragement, belief or ideas. May we all support each other to follow our greatest joys and value our own individual creations!! Sending you all much love and joy in 2016 xx

TRUTH

I know that the path to joy is authenticity, truth and accountability and I am choosing to share with you something, which definitely makes me feel uncomfortable and vulnerable. I have for many years had an expectation on my husband to make me happy. I have compared him to my father, brother, other men and I wonder how he has not buckled under the weight of my expectation. I have also felt that I was responsible for his happiness. I really believe that we all can place a tremendous amount of expectation on our partners, children, friends, careers and businesses to make us feel loved and happy. I have wanted my dream house, a luxurious holiday, expensive nights out and much more and wondered when I received these things, why I didn’t suddenly feel joy!!?? My joy has now come in the following: close connections with family and friends, affection (cuddles), watching my son play, help in the home from my husband, colouring in mandalas, nature walks on my own, sitting in our hammock on the veranda, time together as a family etc. One can never put a price on love: this is the value and quality that fills me up!! I would encourage everyone to voice to all of your loved ones, “I free you from my expectations… I am responsible for my own happiness. You do not need to do or be anything other than who you are. You are enough and I am enough”. Feel free to also share in the comments below where you may have placed expectation on someone or something. Sending you all so much love and joy xx